Anywhere you are and whatever work you do, you will always encounter different challenges at work. There would be extremely hard scenarios that you will face but will also get over with the right attitude and proper thinking. There would be people who might bully you or would even discourage you to do well in your work. All these exist in order to mold you into a better worker. You have to undergo different trials so you will be stronger and you will also see the value of your work even more.
As a freelancer, you will also experience discouragements. You can get this from your family, friends and other people that surround you. Even those from your online network can be discouraging. Even articles that you read online can also be discouraging! But it depends on how you will deal with it. For today’s post, we will give you some tips on how to deal with discouragements so you can turn them into encouragements. But before that, we will also give you a picture of what a discouraged worker is and why people discourage others.
A Discouraged Worker
You would not like to be a discouraged worker. Most of the time a discouraged worker is referred as someone who couldn’t get a job or who remained unemployed for a long time. But this time, we will give it a different definition because we are referring to people who have jobs. Once you are doing good with your work, there will surely be some discouragements to come. Know why? Because that is the nature of people. We will go to that later.
People who listen to discouragements feel down and would no longer pursue to work. There are some who allow others to put them down even if they know they can actually do something. Say for example, you are planning to create your own website and you shared that to a friend. Unfortunately, that friend of yours discouraged you to do it by telling you that you won’t succeed in the field or that you would be spending and not get the projected earnings you want. If you will listen to him, you will no longer pursue with your plan but if you believe in yourself and in your skills, then you will go on. Be sure that before you nod on someone’s discouragement, you check on the facts that will go with it. Study things well. Consider his side and your side. Do some research if necessary. If you find out that you are on the right track, then go on.
Those who are discouraged are setting boundaries for themselves. They do not work on their original goals because they are afraid to fail. They think of failure first and not success. This is also being pessimistic. Pessimists do not succeed. They just stay where they are and will not be able to bring their sails up to get to a farther point. That is why, it is important to be positive all the time.
Also, when you are drowned by the waves discouragement, you will self-pity, will no longer be an efficient worker, will stop doing the things you love, will be afraid to work, will be less productive and you will downgrade your individuality. Do want that to happen to you? Of course not! No one wants to be defeated with discouragements. That is why, it is important that you keep your sails up all the time. Remember, you are the captain of your life’s ship. Do not let any pirates defeat you.
Why People Discourage Others
You might end up wondering why some people discourage others. What are their intentions? What made them take this move? Why of all people, are they trying you pirate your life’s goals? These are common questions especially if you are currently experiencing it. To make it easier for you to understand it, here are some reasons why people discourage others:
1. They envy you. This is the most common reasons. They cannot do what you are capable of doing. They believe that if you do what you want to do, you will succeed. But since they envy you, they don’t want you to take steps to success. Instead, they want you to stop you to take the first step.
2. They consider you a threat. There are people who doesn’t want to be below others. So, if they’ll know that you have plans to work on one thing that they actually wanted, they will hinder you from doing so. They are threatened that you will become better than them. Hence, they will try to infect you with their negativity.
3. They lack knowledge. Some people do not intentionally discourage you. They only lack knowledge about what you are up to. But there are people who would tell you negative things intentionally even if they do not know anything about the subject. They do this because they are afraid to let you know that they are ignorant. They don’t want to look stupid in front of your eyes. Also, they don’t want you to think that you are much better than them.
4. They have tried and failed. Another reason is that they have tried doing what you intend to do now. The thing is, they failed in it. They are now thinking that you might also fail like they did. They are merely sharing their own experience but still, it can give a negative effect on you. We tend to consider points from people who already underwent similar situations which on what we are still planning to do.
5. They dislike you. We cannot deny the fact that there are people who dislike you even without a good reason at all. That is why they would discourage you in anything or almost everything because they do not want you to succeed or be better in anything. The reason is simple, they just dislike you.
There are different reasons why people would discourage you. But whatever their reasons are, it is important that you know how to deal with these situations. This way, you will be able to guard yourself and you could succeed in your own way. Do not be listening to the voices of these pirates. Listen to your own voice and that of other people who supports you. Just try and work on your goals because no one have failed trying.
Turn Discouragements Into Encouragements
Now here is the part where you will get some tips on how to defeat people who wants to put you down. While doing the tips below, always bear in mind that you are the captain of your ship and it will only sink if you let it. It is your choice if you’ll get into the port safe. Read on and learn how to turn discouragements into encouragements.
1. Treat it as a challenge.
When someone discourages you, do not feel down. Instead, consider it as a challenge. Many people have succeeded because they worked better due to the discouragements they receive. It is a matter of perception. Instead of looking at it as a discouragement, look at it as a challenge. This is turning negative things into positive ones.
2. Ask and assess yourself.
Ask yourself why these people are discouraging you. Try to think of the reasons behind their actions. If you feel discouraged, ask yourself why you feel defeated. Then assess yourself. What is the source of your discouragement? How can you overcome it? If you think that one of the reasons are unmet expectations, then go back to that expectation. Was it realistic or the goal you created is just setting yourself for a failure?
3. Figure out other’s reason for discouraging you.
After assessing yourself, take a look at those people who discourages you. Observe them and assess their behaviors. Why are they discouraging you? If you are being discouraged by a boss, he might want to challenge you or bring out the best in you. Other people discourage you because they want to bring you down so they can go up knowing that you are better than them. Some might just hate you and would not want to see you succeed. Knowing their reason will help you to shrug off their discouragements and go on with your plans.
4. Look for someone who motivates you.
If you have a good plan in mind, do not talk with someone whom you know will only give you negative feedback. Look for that person who will say things you want to hear. There are times that we need these kinds of people in order to keep you motivated. If someone discouraged you, talk to other people about that discouragement and what they think about it. This way, it will be easier for you to weigh things well.
5. Go on with own goals.
You could have crafted some plans for your freelance career. Nothing is wrong if you consult other people about it. But you will be able to spot the difference of an honest opinion and a plain discouragement. So if you think the discouragements you received are aimed to put you down, then go on with your goals. Set expectations that are achievable and goals that are doable. This way, it would be impossible for you to fail. Make sure also that you have a backup plan all the time. You can read a post about how to achieve smart goal setting to help you with this.
6. Maximize opportunities.
There are certain opportunities that come along the way. Do not let them pass. Make good use of those opportunities. Grab it and work well on it. This is one way to show those people who are fond of discouraging you that they did not succeed in their goal to defeat you. Doing so will also help you to gain more self-confidence and gain better self-esteem.
7. Perform better.
Aside from maximizing opportunities, see to it that you will improve in your work performance. Once you are a better worker, you will realize that the discouragements you receive have no anchor at all. You will realize that what they are saying are too far from what you can actually do because you can reach your goals unlike what they are trying to point out. You will gain advantages from being a better freelancer like getting more clients and giving quality outputs.
8. Keep track of your accomplishments and improve.
If the “discouraging team” still does not stop what they are doing, then track your accomplishments. List them down and keep them. You can use this to boost your confidence and these can be a proof that what they are saying is not true at all. You can even post your accomplishments in your own portfolio. Aside from that, use it as a benchmark for improvement. Do not just stop where you have succeeded but go on and succeed even more.
9. Be assertive.
Get more respect by being assertive. Do not be a doormat by allowing people to just step on you. If you know you are on the right track, then speak up. If someone discourages you, let them know your point and tell them you will still push through your plans. But never forget to be always respectful despite being assertive.
10. Be positive.
Above all, you need to be positive. Remaining positive will help you to work better because you have good things in mind. Also, this can help you to fight discouragements and you can even turn every negative thing into a positive one that could help you become a better individual and a better freelancer.
Guard Yourself from Discouragements
Discouragements cannot kill you but it can break you if you let it. It will ruin your plans in life and you will no longer be able to sail on the right sea. That is why it is important that you will be able to guard yourself well from discouragements even if there isn’t any yet. For sure, there will come a time that someone would give you doses of discouragements and you might not even notice it. The bad thing is that, you might also not notice that you are already carried by their waves of discouragements. Hence, guard yourself through the tips below:
1. Be firm. Stand on what you want to do. Do not let anyone stop you. Learn to defend yourself if someone discourages you. Make sure that you will firmly hold on to your dreams and plans. Because if you do, no one will be able to stop you from doing it. Even discouragers will stop because they can see that they are just wasting their time..
2. Be smart. Know everything about what you plan of doing. Before you decide on something, study it. Research and read other’s stories about it. These days, it isn’t hard to get into so many helpful articles in the internet which will build you and encourage you. A good decision is seasoned with knowledge.
3. Be determined. Once you are determined, you would sail on the skies and float over mountains. Everything that seems impossible can be possible. Be determined in your tasks and be determined to bring your freelance career to a higher level. With that, you will be able to guard yourself from people who will try to pull you down.
4. Be vigilant. Know when a discourager is around. There are really people who give off negative energy. They speak of negative things and when you hear that, it might also affect you. So, be vigilant that it will not happen. Just let them speak but don’t let them influence you. Instead, try to influence them with your positivity. That might even help them.
5. Be proactive. People who are proactive are ready for negative things to happen. Anticipate discouragements and know how to deal with them even before they come. You have to be proactive in order to control some occurrences that would hinder your actions towards success.
If you learn how to guard yourself, then it would be easier for you to blow away discouragements. It is important to be ready all the time so that when discourages attack, you already know what to do. If you are well guarded, they will not be able to defeat you. Before we end this post, allow us to share this quote from Mark Twain:
- "Keep away from people who try to belittle your ambitions. Small people always do that, but the really great ones make you feel that you, too, can become great."
Hence, do not allow anyone to discourage you because the ones who are truly great will actually help you up. Do not listen to discouragements because these people cannot perfectly understand your dreams and the nature of your work. We hope that this post gave you enough information about discouragements. Have you experienced some discouragements in your freelance work? How did you overcome it? Are there other tips that you can add based on your experience?